Michelle Duggar, Wendy Williams, and Me

Warning: This blog post deals with the subject of sex.

I’m a fan of The Wendy Williams Show. It’s the celebrity dish that I enjoy. She had an interesting bit on the other day about Michelle Duggar.

In case you’re not familiar with the Duggars, they are a large family that has a reality show on TLC, 19 Kids and Counting. Michelle and her husband have 19 children, though I understand a few of their children are now grown and on their own. I’d tell you more, but I’ve never seen the show. I have an antenna, so I don’t get TLC. Everything I know about them comes from entertainment shows and a couple of online-searches.

Back to Wendy Williams. During her Hot Topics segment she talked about an interview that Michelle Duggar had done. They asked Michelle about her secrets to a happy marriage. She suggested that a wife “say yes to sex even when you’re tired.” She went on to say that a friend told her “Be available. Anyone can fix him lunch, but only one person can meet that physical need of love that he has, and you always need to be available when he calls.” Wendy asked her audience to clap if they agreed. A majority of them did. Eventually Wendy admitted that she agreed, too, but would find the suggestion easier to accept from someone who “didn’t have that 80s hair.”

I found that really interesting. No, Michelle Duggar doesn’t have the latest hairstyle. She’s not a model. She’s the mother of a large brood. She lives in Tontitown, Arkansas. I’m not sure how big that town is, but I’m guessing it isn’t a large metropolis. She probably fits in well with her neighbors. And, I imagine she’s had some version of that hairstyle since the 80s. That’s what a lot of women do.

The thing is, it’s not Wendy Williams (or anyone else) she’s trying to attract or impress. Clearly her husband finds her attractive, even with “that 80s hair.” She’s not giving hair style advice. The way she looks has nothing to do with whether her advice (which she’d been asked to give) is good or bad.

For the record, I agree with Michelle Duggar. When I talk with someone about the physical side of marriage, I usually suggest that a wife be as available to her husband as possible. (I would also suggest that a husband be as available to his wife as possible, but I don’t usually have those conversations with men.) I suggest that if a woman isn’t really in the mood at the moment her husband makes his move, instead of saying no, she respond that she could be persuaded. Women usually need a little longer to switch gears than men do. When she’s doing the dishes, or the laundry, or helping the kids with their homework, she isn’t usually thinking sexy thoughts. A bit of extra snuggling can work wonders to help a woman switch from homemaker/mommy mode to sexy wife mode.

So, good for you, Michelle Duggar. It sounds like you have a solid, happy marriage.

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